My 403(b) - which is like a 401(k) for teachers - has changed somehow and so today after school, my financial planner, Ken, came and met with me to discuss my options. He knows from prior meetings that I am a financial moron. Once I even told him that he should speak to me as if I am a retarded kindergartner. I think he thought I was kidding.
Today's meeting went something like this...
Ken: "Blah blah blah blah blah mutual funds blah blah blah blah interest rates blah blah blah?"
Me: [Nods, wondering how such an old guy can have such a thick head of hair]
Ken: "Blah blah blah blah variable annuity blah blah blah Oppenheimer blah blah"
Me: [thinks, "I'm pretty sure The Police wrote a song about Oppenheimer's deadly toy... is he talking about it?"]
Ken: "I recommend blah blah blah blah blah"
Me: "Sounds good" [wondering if it was the pear at lunch that gave her the indigestion]
I'm useless. However, it was a pretty awesome day. First day back with the kids and I just feel like I'm "home" -- and it's good. And hell, I'd love to see Ken teach a bunch of 12-year olds to play in 6/8.