Tuesday, May 19, 2009

EASY DOES IT

Last night I watched one of my all-time favorite movies, A League of Their Own, and absolutely loved it. I know all the lines and just wait for the scenes that choke me up. What a fantastic cast and script! I love that there are a handful of movies that I can call upon to "take me away" - if only for two hours.

I've grown rather comfortable with our evening routine of cooking dinner, doing dishes and then crashing on the couch with The Huz, our laptops and the television. After so many years of not being able to relax, not knowing how to handle free time without an overwhelming sense of guilt creeping in, it's a giant relief to be able to just BE.

I no longer feel that nagging emptiness in my soul. While I still have a touch of wanderlust, I no longer feel like there is some undiscovered destiny for me elsewhere on the planet. I am somehow satiated and it feels good.

I wonder if that's what marriage does? Or being in your thirties? Or both?

2008 was a crazy year: A sabbatical from my job; a month in India; a wedding. At the beginning of 2009, I made a deal with myself to let it be an easier year. So far, it's been nice to be content.

Monday, May 18, 2009

LEAD HEAD

Ugh. I've got the Mondays pretty bad today. I think it's because I woke up around 4:30, rolled over, and fell way back into a really deep sleep. When the alarm went off, I had to climb up from the depths to turn it off. My brain feels like it's full of lead and - nearly five hours later - I just can't seem to get things moving.

Interesting how I seem to be able to be wide awake in the mornings on weekends. Like I can't wait to jump up and start the day. Maybe because I'm allowed to do whatever I want. Just 25 more days of school and then I am free....

Yesterday The Huz and I traveled south with two others to attend the funeral of the Mom of one of our friends. She had been sick for a while with congestive heart failure and other things so it wasn't a total surprise. I was glad to be there for Jeff, as he was really there for me when my Dad died.

Those days were a giant blur, but one clear memory that always pops up was of Jeff and I walking down by the lake. He was there when I needed to get out of the house. He listened when I talked about my Dad, and he was there for me when I didn't want to talk or think about anything at all. Just knowing that he was there provided me with a sense of comfort and support.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

WHERE YA BEEN?

I been around. Certainly not blogging though, that's for sure. I just watched the Dean Karnazes documentary Ultramarathon Man and remembered that I had seen him run his 50th in New York back in 2006. So I went back to my long-abandoned blog to see if I had posted anything about it. Sure enough, I had.

Then I started reading through my old blog entries and realized, "Shit, I used to be really good at blogging. WTF happened?" Life happened, I guess. It's gotten too easy to end up on the couch with The Husband (aka: "The Huz"), checking Facebook and watching bad television. I kind of miss writing for the hell of it. And so, here I am, once again.

It's been a great school year. I can't believe it's already May and we only have five weeks left. The spring concert was a success and now things are beginning to wind down. I've been running a lot and have signed up [again] for the Marine Corps Marathon. I bailed last year because there was just too much else going on. (Did I even mention that I got hitched?) Now I feel like my heart is in it for the right reasons. I am really looking forward to starting the training plan in June, and am currently working to build up a decent mileage base.

There's been a 10-ton blanket of humidity draped over the world today, and the sky finally opened up. Hopefully this rain will chill things off a bit. But it's come with thunder and lightening too, so I think I shall sign off before I fry my Mac.

Cheers for now.